post #5 Helping those you care about

Having trouble helping someone you truly care about, but they wont tell you whats wrong? I'm pretty good with these things; its about how you deal with the issue that helps you out in the end. Friends, partners, family whoever is what you you're focused on. how can you help them?


 

You can go many ways with this. I helped so many of my friends just this week when they end up with a personal issue. Usually they keep it to themselves because the feeling of burdening a person with their issues always pop into their mind, but eventually they'll speak up. How though, is the question? See what i like to do is express how much i care, but not to much where they would get annoyed, just enough where they know they can rely on me when they need to. I sometimes even show them that i care by going out of my way in buying them something nice its usually food because i have it my head that food is the best comfort for those who is troubled. This depends on you, you don't have to do this. I also give a lot of kind advices if i knew what the deal was about and usually its relationship problems so that seems exceptional since i am a advice giver.  After Awhile, maybe asking whats wrong after a reasonable amount of time that may be best fit is suitable since thats what you want to know, but if they still don't tell you try not taking to heart its usually depends on how much they trust you or how critical the problem is. Sometimes its best to ask someone you know they are close too to talk to them. Just helping them even though you aren't the one to talk to them is as important as it is being the one the one talk about it. I find the best thing you could do is show the amount of care you have for them by how you deal with the situation. Its about them feeling better right? Good Luck!

post #4 Overworked

Are you having a long day? week? month? year? Have you just been overworked at work, or at school, or at home, somewhere? It just so happens i have advice for your very overworked schedule. It seems to me that you need a day off. What can you do to get that? There is so many and you probable know what to do, but unlikely to do this because you do not have time. So, what can you do?

 



There are many ways you can go with this; you just need to find the right one of you.  I think as a person with a difficult life you may need to be concerned about what you're leaving unattended so, you should make sure your daily work, certain things you aren't taking with you  is taking cared of by people you can trust. This is a very important factor for getting away from it all. Another thing would be the thing that's keeping you occupied is also taken care of you don't want to leave it without security of some kind. This may be the most best advice for this post since people tend to forget about this little things.

To take a vacation is to take a break from it all, best thing you can do for yourself is book a ticket to a place you want to go to relieve all the stress. You have to be entirely with this there shouldn't any distraction towards this you want to be free from the work for awhile that's why you're doing this. Try to think about yourself while doing this and take the break with out a second thought. If youre unable to do this just stay away, but not far away just enough to keep your mind clear and in peace.

post #3 Friendship

 

Relationships is difficulty to my understanding, to everyone, but what about a friendship? Is that easy? I am one to have a small circle of friends that i truly cherish and  love unconditionally. Not every friendship are the same or turns out the same, though. Having a turning point in a friendship is common like for example that friendship turns into a relationship, it ending, distance, closeness well you should get what i am saying. No friendship is exactly the same similarly a relationship, never exactly the same because in each detail of a relationship cannot be the same to another. One needs to understand that to really enjoy a friendship or any relationship in that matter. Here i am going to try explain different friendship matters and how to deal with them.

Have you ever had a friendship where...

So, you made a friend possible good looking or not and all of a sudden it changes. Either you wanted it to change or they did, but there's a change occurring. What do you do? This really depends on you; since your the one dealing with it. I'll break it down to your perspective and to the friends perspective to really grasp the situation.
First, i will start will your perspective in this situation. Well, You're in a friendship that obviously changes you want to change for whatever reason and want the friend to do the same and accept the change, but you don't want it to end because if you wanted it to end you would've created a noticeable space between the friendship and end right there or explain why the friendship isn't working. So, its in a turning point you change the lane of the friendship to whatever it is you wanting it to go to. So what do you do? Well, it honestly depends on what you're shooting for. You fell for them or something happened and its in great need changes. There is many ways you could go with this you can go with the flow and see if the works with the friend or tell it like it is which i prefer in almost all situations because it will clear any and all misconceptions. If neither of those advice or options and you really want to deal with something heads on well you should lean into what you want and really bring it up as an idea that they may not no of and see how that works. Its like you're getting your answer, but not directly. I find this a simple and constructive idea because a few days ago i was talking to a friend who made it so obvious that he has feelings for me. As someone who can usually see the obvious i knew that i have to make up my mind in secret. He made many hints that we should be in a relationship like "We'd be perfect couple, if were ever gone out" and "If i liked you, i wouldn't tell you because you'd friend zone me." These aren't the best example, but it's real examples. You need to be very observant towards the changes that occurring because if you aren't you are going to miss the hints that they leave you. Its really going to be a challenging, but if you really want something shouldn't you go out and get it?
So, now the friends point of view. You're friend likes you and you don't know what to do. Usually the best relationships are those that were friendships first than grew into a relationship. If the friendship is good than i think you should give them a chance, but if you don't want to than your going to have to be really careful in letting them down. You possibly don't want to lose them so you must tell them the nicest way possible that you don't want that and you may have feelings for someone else or want to be single or you just don't see them that way. You may have heard of these because they are classics, but there classics for a reason just need to let them down gentle and go back  to your life. Some times if the feelings were or are to strong for them they cannot be able to stay around you so, you'd have to give them time to cope it depends on them if they want to still be your friend or not. Sorry, if thats not what you want to hear: i am just stating it as it is you cant have it all.

Is Your Friendship Ending:

I'm sure you noticed your friendship is ending and it was obviously a pretty great friendship since you're here looking for advice; well all i can really say is the best advice here is to talk about it. Something may be going out and they aren't ready to talk about it, they may just found feelings for you and they are just trying to shake it off or maybe you've done something or they heard something that you might've done there is so many things all you could do is just raise the issue and talk about it. They'll eventually tell you and if not i guess the problem was insignificant or the friendship was to them. Sometimes all you can do is just accept it and move on. Maybe, they'd come back and all goes well, but for now just ask.


I can fill this post with as much problems and solutions, but i don't want this post to be endless sensation of words and ideas, if you have any problems you'd like to have an answer to please comment and i will be more than happy to help.

post #2- Relationship problems

 

So, I've decided to start on the three most common area where everyone who is everyone is have trouble in being relationship problems. I know there is so many things in a relationship where people are having problems in, but I'm just going to identify and tell you solutions to basic issues. When you come down to your relationship problems its usually a common issue that can be easily resolved. It just takes time to think about and to find a good solution to it. If there is any question or any post you would like me to do feel free to comment on my post so, i can help you the best way i can in giving the best advice.

1.) Trust:  

Trust, its the base of any and all relationship. the one way you know that the relationship you're in can last. If you don't have this what do you really have? I believe that without this you cant live a happy and healthy relationship. This is something you musts have in a relationship with whomever you care for. You don't want to doubt anyone you love, but you don't want to be taken advantage either. So, you're going to be running your mind mad, if you think that this wont be a serious problem. To be lied to or to feel anything other than honesty and love in a relationship can be seen as a problem. All i can really say for this is to know that without trust you have nothing but true love to keep this relation going, but even that may not be enough. The best thing you can do is to talk about it. Its sometimes hard to do that in some cases, but if you want it to really work you must do what you can do to help save it. Sometimes going to therapy helps, if u find trouble doing it entirely yourself having a professional deal with the problem can really help build trust if there weren't any there to begin with. This can be a best way into really helping this common issue in a relationship. You have to seriously think out what you got to say and say it. There shouldn't be any holding back.
To keep a relationship is difficult enough, but having one with no trust is even harder. If you can't maintain this relationship and can't express the problems the only other real solution is to walk away. You never know that, that may be the best answer to fixing the relationship so, they'd know that they need to change or help them realize that the relation need some work. Sometimes even that doesn't work, but it can help save yourself from a difficult time period.

2.)Lack Of Communication: 

So, of course communication will be the one of the three to be rallied up here for one of the most common found issue for relationships, but it is something that always finds its way as a problem. This seems like something that you can deal with right, something you can identify easily? Well to tell you the truth this issue comes in different ways its always when you first notice; You have to be quick on your toes to locate the situation in your relationship and take action. I'm sure you don't want to end a relationship that can easily be fixed. I have a friend who's been going out for her boyfriend for a few years now. After so many years spent together they've sudden lacked communication and sort of interaction with each other. My friend of course didn't want to give up on this relationship, but everyone knows the saying that "it takes two to tango." Her boyfriend has decided to not put the effort anymore, but hadn't let go of the relationship either. As far as i have seen and heard there are two ways you can go with this situation the first being to re-communicate and point out all the problems and really put back the base of trust and interaction back to the relationship or let go of the relationship since this relationship hasn't been truly going anywhere for awhile now this is an unfortunate idea since they've been together for so long but you got to do whats best for yourself first before taking the responsibilities of others. The only way to really solve a relationship problem is to really focus on whats the cause of the problem you cant be so discrete on a serious situation. Best way into solving anything is to really take initiative on solving the problem.

3.) Priority: 

  To be in a relationship you'd have to have a certain focus area in that relationship. You don't want to be lost in "no mans land" stuck all alone with the the feeling of being uncared for. No matter how short or long you've been in a relationship you need to express your emotions, you need to show that you care. If you decide to stop doing so you will show your partner or whomever that you don't care for them anymore and you don't want that. So, show that you do care and show a little appreciation by doing random loving things for those you care for. Those type of things are what really warms the heart and aren't forgotten. Its usually the little things they look forward to so don't stop expressing your love to them if there's a turning point in you relationship. You must show your affections no matter what because giving a small amount of time or well anytime at all in that matter will bring the best of feelings to your love one. priority is priority you need to give a little time to all that is important to you.

Blog #1

 

My name is Vanessa, i decided to make this blog to help those who can't get over an issue. This is kind of like a advice column except the problem being posted are those of common found issues. I believe that most people will come across an identical issue, but unfortunately "fall flat" on their faces when it comes to solving it. I am known for being able to give really good advice; i want to help everyone and the best way i feel  i could help is by bringing up issues most finds hard to overcome and explain the best  possible way to deal with it. I know that a lot of people wont probable follow my advice, but getting to know about a good solution is just all that i or you yourself needs to know that its a choice you can take if need be.
 This blog will explain not only advice, but problems, many ways in solving it, common errors and faults I've come across. This will hopefully push all of us into thinking through carefully on how to find the best solution and if you cant than at least find the best advice.